No real content, but here's a joke:

(an original, too!)

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A hardware store manager, on his day off, visits the local Sea World. While strolling about and enjoying the various sights, he gasps as he sees one of his employees throwing boxes of Swiss Army Knives into one of the pools.

"What are you doing?!" he asks his employee angrily.

"Well boss," the employee explains, "You said yourself that they're tools for multiple porpoises."